10 Ways To Be More Confident In Your Own Skin
Change how you look at the person in the mirror.
Stella is busy trying to get her groove back, but she has no clue how to revive her usual, confident, sashaying self.
It's you. You're Stella.
Perhaps you have been brought to your knees by an unfortunate event or a failed relationship. Whatever the case, you feel like crap. There might be a specific reason why you're not feeling good about yourself, or it might just be a nagging feeling of "not enough."
No matter the cause, know that everyone experiences moments of not seeing themselves clearly and feeling unsure of who they are. Insecurity is an inevitable part of life. All it means is it's time to upgrade your confidence and change how you view yourself.
Here are 10 easy steps towards becoming the most authentically confident version of yourself.
1. Change Your Mindset
Feeling comfortable in your own skin has nothing to do with how you look. You're more than your body; it's just a part of you. Revel in the fact that your body allows you to experience life in all its glory. From first kisses to sunsets to cool sheets to live music - your body allows you to experience so much pleasure every day. Take some time to sincerely thank your body for being your tireless companion and show yourself some love.
2. Prioritize Yourself
Taking care of yourself is key when it comes to growing self-confidence. By prioritizing yourself and your own needs, you’ll be more in-tune with who you are. You can prioritize yourself in several different ways, including everything from learning to say “no” to people who rob you of your energy to prioritizing “me” time.
Those who don’t take the proper time for themselves are often harder on themselves in a multitude of ways. If you’re someone who works and works without taking the necessary time to relax and decompress, you’ll feel the consequences in all aspects of your life, especially when it comes to the way you view yourself.
3. Don’t go with the flow
There are lots of people that go with the flow because it's easier. They don't want to cause a fuss or stand out. Instead of standing up for who they are, or what they believe, they keep changing to fit their surroundings. It can leave them feeling like a chameleon without their own skin.
There are times when you have to swim against the tide. When you're confident, you're not focused on catering to everyone else's needs. You know what your values are, what you believe in, what you're able to compromise on, and where your firm limits are. You have your own opinions and can voice them — even when everyone around you is shaking their heads.
How you think about yourself is connected to how you feel in your body. In a funk, you may look at yourself differently. To stay motivated and happy, it is crucial to make time for the things you enjoy. Take time to do the things that make you feel calm and relaxed like a bubble bath or journaling, especially if you feel overwhelmed.
As a complement to your self care routine, you can also deal with stressful situations by making plans to get yourself out of them. For example, if you're in a relationship that causes you immense stress, making a plan to get out will help you feel more secure. The simple act of planning–whether it be planning your day or planning your future– will help you feel calm and in control.
5. Get Naked
If you’re someone who avoids looking at your naked body in the mirror, it’s time to open your eyes. Spending time naked can help you gain self-confidence and feel more comfortable in your body. The tendency to hide your body from even yourself can quickly spiral and start to make you uncomfortable in your own skin.
As you spend more time with your naked body you'll become more comfortable with it. The most important part is to treat your body how you'd treat your best friend.
Be kind to yourself when looking in the mirror. Thank your body for all of the things it's capable of. Living life to the fullest would be impossible without the one body you have been given. Although spending more time naked may be difficult for some of us who avoid mirrors and cameras, we guarantee it will be beneficial.
If parading around your apartment in the buff is a step too far, try sleeping naked first and see what happens.
6. Accept that you are ever changing
Who you are is constantly changing. It is important that you recognize this fact.
In order to be comfortable in your skin, you have to be comfortable with the ways in which your body can and will change.
This goes for both your outer appearance and your inner being. The person that you are today isn’t the same as yesterday and won’t be the same tomorrow. You are constantly growing and changing, and it is a truly beautiful process. Don’t run from the past or sprint towards the future. Get comfortable with who you are today and all the other beautiful iterations of you.
7. Take Yourself on a date
Once you’ve accepted the foundation of who you are you may find that you naturally want to be kinder to yourself, do nice things for yourself, or lavish yourself in luxury. Do it! This is a sign that your levels of self-love, self-confidence, and self-esteem are skyrocketing.
Once you find your mojo, don’t make it a special occasion! You deserve to feel taken care of everyday, and you don’t have to wait on anyone to do it for you. Whether it’s a solo trip to the movies or a backpacking trip across Europe, take time to date yourself on a regular basis.
8. Express Yourself
Expressing yourself is one of the best ways to improve your self-confidence. If you’re not expressing yourself and instead choose to hide away, your self-confidence can take a serious hit.
Schedule a GNO at the karaoke bar and sing your heart out. Pick up a canvas and empty your emotions into the brush. Do whatever helps you feel connected to your emotions and your higher self. Spending time with that version of yourself will be like gasoline to your self-confidence fire.
9. Switch it Up
Self-acceptance is key to high self-esteem, but no one said makeovers were off limits.
Get that radical haircut you’ve been wanting, or treat yourself to those yummy honey-colored highlights. Maybe you’re ready to revamp your entire wardrobe and try out the punk rocker look.
Whatever you’ve been wanting to change, go for it! When your confidence is low, it’s easy to get stuck in a mental and physical rut feeling like you have to stay the same to fit into what is “acceptable” for you. F that.
If you’re doing the inner work of building your self-esteem, and you compliment that with a tune-up of your appearance that feels authentically “you”, the combo can slingshot you into a fantastic new version of yourself.
10. Get out into the world
Don't wait for life to show up at your door - take it! The world is craving a taste of all the confidence you’ve been cultivating, and you’re prime to deliver. Be curious and explore the world around you. Move towards your fears, rather than cower from them. This is the way you test the strength you’ve built.
We’d love to hear from you. What body part do you criticize the most? And how did it feel to turn that negative body banter into a sexy self-love affirmation? Drop a comment below and share your self-love.